I was sitting here reading this post and Holly's words of hurt and happiness. It made me reflect on my time here in ES and how the people in here have truly become my friends, not just online aquaintances. Many of the people I have met from ES are my best of friends in life. After having met so many of you in person (over 400) in the past four years and Frostbite was one of the first, I know that ES is not just a forum to find "the one", but it is a gathering place of all of us around the world to find friendship in each other. We laugh, we cry, we give advice and support to each other in the chat room, but mostly we love each other. Even though many of us have never met in person. I think that is a wonderful thing! When it is so easy to feel like we have given up on "love", step back and take a look at what real love is in our lives. Our faith, our families, our animals, and our FRIENDS! Sometimes we find each other, as Mark and Holly did and numerous others in ES, but mostly we find friendship with people from many cultures, with many different personalities and we learn to communicate our emotions across the world through a keyboard. Holly, I am glad to have known Mark and to know you and to count you amoung the many friends I have made in ES over the years. I grieve with you in the loss of Mark and all the other ES friends we have lost in the last few years. Tim, Wolfie, Kemp, 66, all of whom I met in person and I am humbly grateful to God for having met them all and called them friends. I am also glad that all of you are a part of my world and the ES family. I Love You ALL....My Dear ES Friends! Thanks! Vickie aka Jane

((((Holly)))) Again, just a chat friend of Mark's, but my heart goes out to you. Take care Sweet

Holly,what can a person say....Mark will be missed by all that knew him.He was one of the first people i met from ES at Shorties get together in North Platte.I use to always kid him about buying my mare(grey mare that he bought from Bootcut)and whenever i came in the chatroom he would always say "Pasture..hows yer putter swingin".He would always say how he had to get off the computer before you nailed him with a skillet.I will miss those times as will all of us that have known him over the years. Dean

HOlly I am so sorry. Mark was one of my first friends on here back in th early days. I'm gonna miss the loft and him throwin Trigger out the window. We had many laughs together as well as heartful conversations. I know he loved U very much! Jen

((( Holly, Family & Friends ))) I, as everyone else was saddened to hear of your loss. There are no words to comfort or ease the pain at this time, only time heals. I talked with Frost many times in chat and enjoyed his wit and humor. Holly, I know the pain you are going thru and as we all know how our online friends sometimes get us thru difficult times, the same is here. The following is a link to a grief group that I was a part of for 4 years. This is a gorgeous wonderful chat site now dedicated to the lady who started it. groww.org ((( Hugs ))) Kath

This post shows that life is so very fragile and precious and you should make every day like it your last because you just never know when it will be. Now go show the special people and animals in your life that you love them. I know I hug my horse every day before I go off into the world. Double

OMG!! I can't believe he's gone!! Seemed like just yesterday we were "playin" in the chatroom..me and Jen tryin to coax him outta the loft to brand him..or have stick pony barrel races planned. He was a great guy and he loved Holly and his horses. Must be one helluva party goin on up there with Tim, Kempy, Wolfie and now Frosty. Miss you buddy. Annie

Holly, I know there is nothing I can say that will bring you as much comfort as him being with you.... But He will always be with you in mind/thought and memories... I know though, he is still watching and helping you from heaven. Im sure he is sending you his strength to help you get thru this.... I know this is going to be really hard for quite a while but we are all here for you... Im sending you my condolances, I m so sorry... I know he was a good guy.............Sharon

continuation of Holly's post: I have many personal notes of appreciation to write during the next weeks. Until I get them written, please accept this post as a "thank you" for your well-wishes, prayers, phone calls, flowers, and gracious offers of help. I am blessed to have the support of you wonderful ES members and I can feel the sincerity of your emotions in the above posts. In humility and with thankfulness, Holly (and Mark . . . because I know my happiness and welfare was his first priority, and it would reassure him to know that I have the support of so many friends.)

I was given permission from Holly to post this reply she had on Horseman's Advisor. This was written on March 31st: Dear Friends, I write this from the home of two of Mark's best friends, who have known him for 30+ years . . . I wanted to stay with his friends rather than with his family. Mark was "owned" by his three sisters for 53 years . . . I only had him for three, yet it is in the stories and love of his friends that I find him joyously alive. Mark's best friend from Oregon came down and stayed with us, too, so we have had a good time sharing our personal joy in knowing him by remembering him together. This time in CA has been rather strange for me. I was never here in CA without Mark, yet here I am, laughing at stories of his exploits and talking about practical things. The real sense of loss will return as I walk into the house at the farm in KS and see his hats and coats and gloves (he had more of those than anyone I ever met) lined up on the hooks in the hallway . . . and as I see the mix of his and my laundry sitting atop the dryer in the laundry room. It is at home that his mementoes of love are attached to the windows above my kitchen sink, and where sits the silly Scooby-Do singing Valentine toy that he brought home for Valentine's Day. At home is where I will have to struggle with his absence. On the trip to San Jose, I used my cell phone to talk to him in Dallas and as I got off the plane here in San Jose. I have never arrived in San Jose without Mark meeting me in the airport and telling me how glad he was to have me home. I have left his cell phone charging on the kitchen counter at home, so if I call, I can hear his voice asking me to leave a message. The funeral here was unlike the memorial we had for him in KS. In KS, it was much more emotional. The funeral here was for his family's sake . . . his sisters and their families needed to have his body here for their own comfort. I return home to KS tomorrow. My daughter and son-in-law from So. Carolina drove all day to reach KS in time for Mark's memorial at the funeral home there. They are staying at the farm, taking care of dogs and cats, and will pick me up at the airport on Sunday night . . . I won't have to walk into an empty house. My youngest daughter came to CA for the funeral here and is staying here at the home of Mark's good friends. I have heard that my oldest son and his wife are coming to KS on Wednesday to stay for a few days . . . and that my son and daughter-in-law in Seattle are going to try to visit within the next few months. I know that I will need some alone time just to punch pillows, sob, and expel some of the frustrations of being alone. The physical work that accompanies horse and farm ownership will be therapeutic, I know. There is no shortcut through the grieving process. I will have to go through each stage as it comes, and it is comforting to know that people will be there physically from time to time. I will read these posts many times over the next weeks and months as I struggle with missing Mark. Do not be sad for me . . . be happy for me that I had such an incredible three years of joy and freedom with my hero. Thank you for your offers of help. I need to decide what course to take at the farm. I plan to stay there . . . but am not sure of the scope of what I can accomplish there. I know that Mark wanted the farm to work . . . He had so many dreams . . . just didn't have the stamina, and hoped the surgery would buy him time. The only organization I know to which Mark sent donations was www.bluebonnetequine.org Neglect and abuse of animals made his blood boil . . . and God help the person who hurt an animal in Mark's presence.